Another Letter

Dear Newcastle Brown Ale,

Why did you put blank stickers in my husband's 12pk? I am not so sure of other beer drinkers, but I know for sure that my husband does not like to color. I have asked him. On many different occasions.

I would however, like to thank you for providing me with a good use for some markers I happen to have. And and excuse to color like a 5 year old. Actually, those letters are kinda thin, and it takes some skill to trace around them.

Sincerely,
Me

PS- This is what resulted from your cleverly placed sticker madness. Hope you like It!

The beginning: Yes, those are my markers, and yes, they are kinda sorted by color. I am OCD about how my colors are arranged in the box, because I need to find the color that I want quickly.

Sticker 1: The St. Patty's Day



Colored in many shades of green, the St. Patty's Day Newcastle is both functional and refreshing! Don't worry, it doesn't taste green!














Sticker 2: NewCastle Throwback



With all the companies going back to their roots, Newcastle went back to the eighties, when they did a little too much coke and decided that neon colors would make the logo more noticeable. It worked, however, guys spotted drinking this Newcastle got the shit beat out of them and the word "POOFTER" written on thier forehead in sharpie.








Sticker 3:Girlcastle



Newcastle's early 90's experiment with label colors was to try and get women to drink more beer. Once again, it resulted in guys getting the shit beat out of them and the word "POOFTER" written on thier forehead in sharpie.











Sticker 4: Gothcastle




Oh come on. Everybody had a goth phase. Some people just forgot to burn the evidence.














Sticker 5: The Red White and Bluecastle



Designed for American Independence Day. It works in England too, because the flags are the same color! Too bad England doesn't have an Independence Day. They still have a queen and stuff!












Sticker 6: The Poocastle



What the hell did you expect?! Somebody was gonna actually use these things, and somebody was gonna turn it into something nasty. What do you want from me, I'm not DaVinci, I'm just a bored 27 year old with markers! I can only come up with so many original ideas before I say, Aww fuck it, lets make poo jokes!